I Woke Up With A Fat Chick

I hope you can see the humor in this one, and don't let it happen to you...originally posted under BrianDamage... I Woke Up With A Fat Chick I woke up and couldn't believe my eyes, When I caught sight of those monster thighs, Was that a cow that was sucking my dick? No, I woke up with a very fat chick. The sight of her got me thinking, I really should give up drinking, As if I needed a reason why, I should also stop getting high. Looking at this gruesome sight, I tried to recall what I did last night, How did I possibly wind up with her? But my mind was simply in a blur. Could I have picked her up in a bar? How did she possibly fit in my car? I was no longer in the mood, As I thought of ways to protect my food. I thought about the weight limit of my bed, If she rolls over, I'll be dead, I tried to think of a good excuse, For me to turn this cow loose. Not trying to sound really mean, But she was the biggest I have seen, If she had an appetite, No telling what she would bite. A girl so big she had her own zip code, Now here she was in my abode, No way could I have fun, With a girl who outweighed me three to one. Just a warning from me to you, Be careful what you go and do, Because if you think you're seeing double, You just might be in really big trouble. 04-14-10.